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The Crypt Keeper Welcomes You!

In an effort to make the blog load more efficiently I have relegated all but the most recent posts here to the gutter pages no one ever reads. Even so, I felt I should encourage people passing by to check out the archives. And while you're reading, feel free to admire the new, near-record load time!

Another point: in an effort to improve my web traffic, I will occasionally just mention a bunch of pointless popular crap to trick websters into stumbling across this blog. According to top people, these key phrases should capture some roaming, free-range eyeballs:

Britney Spears no panties train wreck.
Dancing with the Stars OMG awesome.
Dane Cook funnier than Jesus.
How to murder your wife and get away with it.
Foolproof three step plan to get out of Iraq.
Amy Fisher Sex Tape 100% Buttafuoco-free.
Hannah Montana Tickets Cheap.

Welcome new readers! Have a look around. Someone will be with you shortly.

Busted Up Pup

Awww!

McSmack!

From bits and pieces.

Kurt Vonnegut: The "American Mark Twain"

"Vonnegut was the American Mark Twain. He even looked liked him. Everybody loved Vonnegut, whereas Norman was a much more controversial figure," says J. Michael Lennon, the literary executor for Mailer, who died Nov. 10 at age 84.

Here in the Washington Post.