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Showing posts with label rotten tomatoes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rotten tomatoes. Show all posts
Monday, May 12, 2008
Saturday, July 07, 2007
Shazbot!
Speaking of not being funny, here's Robin "RV" Williams in his latest movie, "License to Wed", currently enjoying a 9% Rotten rating on the Rotten Tomatoes website. That's up from 8% only a few short days ago.
Has anyone ever burned through the love of their public more quickly or with more finality than Robin Williams? Oh, right. Cuba Gooding Jr. I forgot about him. George W. Bush? Oh, yeah. Him too.
Well, Robin, cheer up. There is always next year, when you're due to have two hilariously hilarious films released. First up is Old Dogs, the plot of which (according to IMDB) unfolds thusly: Two friends and business partners find their lives turned upside down when strange circumstances lead to them being placed in the care of 7-year-old twins.
Then America will celebrate the release of The Krazees, which according to IMDB tells the following story: Unable to deal with his daughter reaching puberty, a psychologist (Williams) has to get a handle on his emotions, which have come to life as different characters.
Urr...
Following that winning formula, I came up with a few movie ideas that I think would be perfect vehicles for Mr. Robin Williams. Robin, if we get on this right away we could have all of these out for Christmas of '08!
Polecat!: A researcher at the North Pole gets brain frostbite, and returns home thinking that it's 1955 and that he's a jazz clarinetist in the Dave Brubeck Quartet. His doctors tell the family that he's got to come out of his delusion on his own, and that if anyone tried to wake him back into reality the shock could kill him. The whole town dresses and acts like it's 1955 and everyone falls in love with a simpler time. Snoop Dogg could play the mayor.
Tooth & Nail: The tooth fairy is called out of retirement after his replacement signs an endorsement deal with a candy company bent on rotting out the teeth of every child on earth. The turncoat tooth fairy could be played by Dane Cook!
Hip Hop Henderson: a repressed middle-aged accountant takes a sabbatical from his job and begins a new life as the world's hottest rap artist. Queen Latifah could be his manager! Will he return to his old life or won't he?
The Bowling Greenes: Professional bowler "Booger" Greene tries to encourage his teenage daughters to continue in the proud family business, but they want nothing to do with it. He gets advice from his bowling ball, which speaks with the voice of Patton Oswalt! The daughters could be the Duff sisters.
The Jumping Beanes: An Evel Kneivel- like stunt motorcyclist named Herbert Beane travels and performs with his wife and three children until his wife files for divorce and takes the kids with her. In an effort to prove himself to them, he hires a new family, and plans the most spectacular family stunt of them all! The hired wife could be Wanda Sykes!
If you have any ideas of your own, please post them in the comments section. I know for a fact that Robin Williams reads this blog several times a day and he'll probably make a movie based on all of your suggestions.
Has anyone ever burned through the love of their public more quickly or with more finality than Robin Williams? Oh, right. Cuba Gooding Jr. I forgot about him. George W. Bush? Oh, yeah. Him too.
Well, Robin, cheer up. There is always next year, when you're due to have two hilariously hilarious films released. First up is Old Dogs, the plot of which (according to IMDB) unfolds thusly: Two friends and business partners find their lives turned upside down when strange circumstances lead to them being placed in the care of 7-year-old twins.
Then America will celebrate the release of The Krazees, which according to IMDB tells the following story: Unable to deal with his daughter reaching puberty, a psychologist (Williams) has to get a handle on his emotions, which have come to life as different characters.
Urr...
Following that winning formula, I came up with a few movie ideas that I think would be perfect vehicles for Mr. Robin Williams. Robin, if we get on this right away we could have all of these out for Christmas of '08!
Polecat!: A researcher at the North Pole gets brain frostbite, and returns home thinking that it's 1955 and that he's a jazz clarinetist in the Dave Brubeck Quartet. His doctors tell the family that he's got to come out of his delusion on his own, and that if anyone tried to wake him back into reality the shock could kill him. The whole town dresses and acts like it's 1955 and everyone falls in love with a simpler time. Snoop Dogg could play the mayor.
Tooth & Nail: The tooth fairy is called out of retirement after his replacement signs an endorsement deal with a candy company bent on rotting out the teeth of every child on earth. The turncoat tooth fairy could be played by Dane Cook!
Hip Hop Henderson: a repressed middle-aged accountant takes a sabbatical from his job and begins a new life as the world's hottest rap artist. Queen Latifah could be his manager! Will he return to his old life or won't he?
The Bowling Greenes: Professional bowler "Booger" Greene tries to encourage his teenage daughters to continue in the proud family business, but they want nothing to do with it. He gets advice from his bowling ball, which speaks with the voice of Patton Oswalt! The daughters could be the Duff sisters.
The Jumping Beanes: An Evel Kneivel- like stunt motorcyclist named Herbert Beane travels and performs with his wife and three children until his wife files for divorce and takes the kids with her. In an effort to prove himself to them, he hires a new family, and plans the most spectacular family stunt of them all! The hired wife could be Wanda Sykes!
If you have any ideas of your own, please post them in the comments section. I know for a fact that Robin Williams reads this blog several times a day and he'll probably make a movie based on all of your suggestions.
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